>>319229507
Really though, it's the biggest source of load in this game is other players: That's why vrchat is such a beast - not every map will do this. There's a couple esoteric maps out there that are like one to nine draw calls, like that graff tunnel map all the dancers go to.
I was there on a sunday meetup once and it was the first time i've ever been with more than 10 people in vrchat on a 1070 and had 90 frames. It was the strangest - the map isn't interacting with the users except with light probes and a baked reflection probe and it's apparently one material. 
VRCon 2020 is pretty great too, all SH lighting. The New years world should be good too since it was made by the same people, but I haven't been there yet. 
wrongly set up background sound is also a huge issue for ram and cpu. Realtime render textures are a small load but not as bad as they could be, realtime soft shadows in shadowmask are a real killer. Real time lights can suck too, except for the one directional light, and all of those things only get costly if they're hitting a bunch of players at once, or something breaks batching in a weird way. Polycount doesn't matter until you're into the 10's of millions on players, polycount on static worlds is almost meaningless, even on quest. Where it matters is if you have a ton of materials to go with that.
Almost All of that is CPU load - your gpu has nearly nothing to do with it. 
VRChat (and unity 2018.4 in general) has ways to make things insanely fast, but when the most basic lighting setup (the defaults it comes with) quadruple draw calls on most players out of the gate there's not much you can do - every player is like rendering 4 players at the same time in most maps. You can tell easily when it's done well arbitrarily if you get full frames by yourself, (loading playerlocal+player layers) and you only go into reprojection after about 5 or 10 people with single material @4k models. Other maps will do that in +1 player.