>>269928107
I know what this actually is. For the longest time in my life I have been totally foreign to the concept of affection from anyone who wasn’t my Ma or Pa. 

When I arrived at /vrg/ and received the first signs of casual affection from anons, I experienced some rather brutal confusion, fear, suspicion and eventually hatred for them, assuming they were lying and trying to manipulate me. It took the greater part of a year to sort these feelings out and now when someone acts nice to me I feel absolutely nothing. Not love, not hate, but nothing.

I wish I could just be happy, but that isn’t an option for some types of people I guess. If you have strong willpower, I know you can persevere.

Just please don’t make the mistake that others have and blame everyone else for your own insanity and lash out, which only shares your grief with others and causes problems (like Jelly, Cleet and others have when they were still here)