Well, I think I need to do this for both our sakes. You’ve routinely ignored what I said about why
this can’t work and after I told you to stop saying things that make me uncomfortable, you continued. It
pains me, it really does, I will never be what you want me to be. Whatever romanticized version you have
of me in your mind it isn’t me Panda. I was a bad person and a terrible boyfriend to you. I broke things
off before they got even worse because I knew for a fact it was going to be worse. My mental condition
has been completely out of control lately and it’s not stopping, it’s getting even worse. You cannot ease
this, you cannot offer help, there is nothing in your power you can do, nothing.
I wanted things with you badly but you opened a door that unleashed my inner demon. That
demon is who I really am, sometimes I hate that person, other days I can’t get enough of it. I will not
willingly put something through dealing with me in this state, I’m nothing but a beast. I’m not to be
tamed or wanted, I’m just a tool of desire. I don’t care what praise you give me; I am 100% undeserving
of it. You can’t deny that. Open your eyes and look, really look. What I did to you was unfair and not
okay. I’m going to block you now because you need to stop thinking that simply responding to you will
have any impact on our relationship. There is zero chance of us getting back together.
Also, please stop messaging people about me, it’s very concerning. I know you need
friends to rely on to work through this on your end, but take some time and really think about everything
we had. Don’t just latch onto emotion, look at it reasonably, for me.