Jelly hated /vrg/! The whole /vrg/ discord!
Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.

It could be, perhaps, that his Oculus Rift was too tight.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.

But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his penis was two sizes too small.

But, whatever the reason, his penis or his Oculus Rift,
He stood there on /vrg/ Eve hating the Discorders,

Staring down from his cave with a sour, Grinchy frown
At the warm lighted windows below in their discord,

For he knew every Anon down in the thread beneath
Was busy now hanging a hollywho Feath.

"And they're hanging their VRstockings," he snarled with a sneer.
"Tomorrow is /vrg/! It's practically here!"

Then he growled, with his Jelly fingers nervously drumming,
"I must find some way to keep /vrg/ from CHOOOMING!

For, tomorrow, I know all the Anon girls and boys
Will wake bright and early. They'll rush for their Official /vrg/TM Events!

And then! Oh, the SHITPOST! Oh, the SHITPOST! SHITPOST! SHITPOST! SHITPOST!
There's one thing I hate! All the SHITPOST! SHITPOST! SHITPOST! SHITPOST!