i dont play with you guys and most of my friends dont play VR shit, plus im new to the VR Chat scene. So i have to find VR friends in VR games

So... is VR Chat being just as difficult to socialize in as real life, normal? I generally have difficulty dealing with speaking up unless its something i know a lot about already. Im a socially awkward fuck outside my comfort zone. I prefer if i could make my own avatar to talk about if people ask, but thats a ton of work so i resort to avatars from games i like, such as Genshit or something. Role playing though, im not into that. Butting into people's convos is really weird, but so is just floating around and eavesdropping. WTF i do?