>>347144578
real friends:
- suck my dick
- hangout with me when i'm shitfaced
- watch movies with me
- show me cool worlds we can hangout in

my best friends
- suck my dick, let me suck theirs
- not only don't mind that i'm shitfaced but drink with me when i am
- come up with cool movies for us to watch together
- invite me / join on me out of the blue, always happy to see me

people who pretend to be friends but clearly aren't
- say they like me, won't even suck my dick
- tell me i should quit drinking, "you're killing yourself with that poison"
- don't have time to watch movies with me
- are always on orange, scoff when i join on them when they are on friends+

don't waste your time on the wrong people, you can't be everyone's friend, some people are just puritans to the core, use your time to find the fun ones instead